Ok so I have been sitting on this video for longer than a year. So here is a little backstory. In the beginning of 2020 I was and Uber driver I was also a part-time bartender aside from running this business. I hadn't yet considered it to be a full-time gig.
My bartending job had these artist grants once a year. I had previously applied for one and didn't get it for my freelance photography. This year I was ready. Before anything I always had a clear vision of what I was going to do in my mind I already drafted a whole business plan, i just didn't know it at the time. My plan... I'd work on my craft get better at it. Start e-commerce site then after I would do markets to spread the word. Build my email list.
When I got the opportunity to enter the grant again I knew I had to. This time around they want it a video as an entry and I was hyped because visuals is my thing. So I started jotting down ideas drafted the copy, recorded the content and eventually I had the video. This is the entry video the goal is to streamline production necessary to obtain more wholesale Orders, which would allow me to scale my business and grow. I submitted it, I definitely made it through the second round the next step was a budget showing what we would use the funds for. Easy peasy... i've had the list in my head for ever. Lol
Unfortunately I never got around to sending that budget because the grant was indefinitely postponed because of coronavirus. I was furloughed, but I still had Uber to supplement my income. Then I got sick I got the Rona really bad. I made it out alive still trying to get through it. I couldn't bring myself to keep driving Uber, no matter how much debt i was falling into. I still had some PTSD from getting sick the first time. And honestly i was scared to get sick again and depressed.
Long story short but not really, It has taken me a lot of time and mental energy to decide to do this full-time to give it my all to not have any back ups to put all my energy and trust in the universe, and in myself. That my work is going to pay off. I have never done this before and I am seriously scared but also excited about all the opportunities. I'm doing something that I'm passionate about and that helps others. Although I never got around to getting the grant. I still have a lot of plans, and there are other grants.
Thank you everyone who has shown support for what I do and what I plan to do, it means the world. I never would've gotten so far without you so. This year i was focused and i accomplished alot and it has allowed me to define what i really have to offer. Yes i make skin care products rooted in spirituality and good energy. But this year i was able to really focus on my mental health struggles and use that as away to bring comfort to others. My purpose has been revealed and i'm so excited to continue this work.
The security blanket towel that is. lol I'm putting this out into the universe I am 100% invested in making this work. This is my number one priority this is my baby and I shall treat this like my main job not a hustle anymore. (not that i ever treated as a hustle) Don't get me wrong the hustle still in me, I am a New Yorker after all but I'm putting all my eggs in one basket and I'm not giving up. I'm not quitting ever. I'm officially self employed. So here's to new beginnings. Here's to future me and everything that I will accomplish and that warehouse space that I've been dreaming about and those workshop classes that I've been planning and all the other products that I haven't yet thought of that let my help anyone going thru a hard time. Cheers to that. Cheers to following your dreams wholeheartedly even when you're terrified. I believe in my vision and i believe that if i can do it you can to. Wish me luck🤞🏼
Ps. Fuck Covid
Pps. How are you guys doing? how are you guys feeling, it's been a heavy year. Talk to me.
]]>
After a while, they brought me into a tent where I was told I probably am COVID positive. They tested me outside in triage. Then walked me inside had me lay in a stretcher and pushed me into the hallway into the Blue zone.
A hallway overrun with sick patients, on oxygen, ventilators, and intubated. Crammed up less than an inch away from each other. Everything was so chaotic, loud, and busy. Nurses taking my vitals writing down my bp, oxygen level, and temp on paper towels and stuffing it in there coats. All I could do was look around at all the scared people. Just a few inches from me a man was getting intubated, workers dragging oxygen tanks from one patient to the next. Some of us had a mask on, but having mine on made it a lot harder for me to breathe even with the oxygen and the more I panicked the more I gasped for air. I should have the mask on, there are a lot of sicker patients than me. All the while my phone is blowing up, the family chat is filled with everyone talking about me. Everyone asking if I'm ok and I'm clearly not. After a few hrs, I got an Xray in the hallway still, while I keep telling anyone who would listen, I can't breathe even with the oxygen. They told me my oxygen levels are ok and I need to stay calm. It was a few hrs later till I was pushed into another room to be admitted. A smaller room but just as crowded. Many of the beds next to me read DNR. It was a whole day later and I was still waiting for a room and bed. The entire room cleared out and new sicker people got priority. My tests haven't come back yet but the nurses kept telling me I definitely have it and probably have pneumonia too. Cool
They started giving me that drug Trump keeps promoting Hydroxychloroquine which is terrifying because doctors flat out told me there is no proof or data this works. But it could. And there was, of course, many articles I had read before getting sick about people who have taken this drug and died from it. I got worse before I got better. The fever ran hi everyday. In 48 hrs my oxygen levels got worse. Nurses started bringing me blood thinners, to prevent blood clots. I was told because of my heart medication, but I had never been on heart medication in my life. When I questioned it they told me my PCP confirmed I was. This was alarming because as far as I know there is nothing wrong with my heart. I later found out the blood thinners were given to me for another reason, to prevent my blood from clotting, because apparently that was a newer symptom they had discovered, there's just not a lot of communication happening.
Shortly after I was told I qualified for Plasma infusion. To be honest I didn't know what that meant and was still worried about any treatment potentially making me worse. But I consulted with my family and my sister in law is a doctor and she assured me it's safe and I should definitely do the treatment.
Thank god I agreed, because that's what saved me. My symptoms started to improve after 2 dosages of plasma. That and my friends and family and all the support saved me. My sister made me feel safe and loved even from afar. Talked to my doctor every single day, made sure I came home to a better environment. Brought me groceries, I love you. Thank you for taking the stress off me and keeping the family informed when I was too weak to reply to anyone.
My friends who delivered packages and groceries to me, kept me company while I was in an out of consciousness thru my fevered state. Who kept me sane, and from going to dark places, sent me food, clean pajamas, healing crystals, and even went to my apt to clean and fix up the place. My friends who had to learn how to package/ label and ship out orders because I had pending orders for 2 weeks now and was always worrying about my business and lack of communication on social media. I had to turn off my store to stop orders from coming in. My friends who stood in front of a random building that I had a view of from my room so they can wave to me from 7 stories hi. I really love you guys.
To all my family who was worried and praying thank you, to all my family who has sent me money to help me along with my recovery during isolation. It means the world to me. To my doctor who held my hand and comforted me while I was scared and struggling to breathe. This is insane. I'm so grateful to be alive and beat this thing, it's overwhelming. Okay, this is definitely longer then I intended.
Before the quarantined happened we were working on a new collection and a new Restock date. Unfortunately, that was paused but only temporarily. A lot of things are currently sold out in the shop. As of now, we are still not in production but I'm counting down the days till we can get started up again and making new things for you guys. To be honest I'm eager to be productive again but I am still not 100 percent and any little activity leaves me really tired.
Production for new collection will not start until May, so please bear with me as I try to get things up and running again. I want to assure you guys I am doing my best and everything will be done with your safety in mind. Although I am cleared and in recovery, we still want to give it time as always I will be handling production and shipping with even more safety precautions than before.
Lastly, I just want to say that over the course of the last few weeks things have changed dramatically. The world is a different place now. Please, please please be safe and keep your loved ones safe. Those who are hi risk please stay in isolation. This virus is so deadly. Stay safe and blessed. If you guys have any questions about anything I've talked about here or my experience in general. Please ask away. I'm eager to get my life and business back to some sort of normalcy.